A friend gave me the book "A Stand-up Comic Sits Down with Jesus" by Rich Praytor. Each chapter has something funny (either his thoughts or someone else's), a Bible verse, an inspirational thought, and a prayer.
I read chapter 39 last night. The title is "The Rules----This Time By Men"; there are 26 of them. I am including ten of them; some of them made me smile -- others made me laugh. Remember that I have a twisted sense of humor
* if something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways make you sad or angry, we meant the other one;
* whenever possible, please say what you have to say during commercials;
* ALL men see in only 16 colors, like a Windows default setting. Peach is a fruit; pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is;
* when we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear if fine. Really.
* anything we said six months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after seven days.
* I'm in shape. Round is a shape.
* shopping is not a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
* most guys own three pairs of shoes---tops. What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of 30, would look good with your dress?
* we are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.
* if you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
"Father, give me the grace to accept the ways in which other people are different from me.
I pray I would embrace the differences I have with my spouse and learn to accept them as he/she accepts mine.
Thank You, God, for differences and the joy they bring.